by Vicki Hertz (Spokane, WA)I'D LIKE TO SHARE an incident that exemplifies the dynamics of two individuals from disparate cultures each at their unique level on the international learning continuum. On our return trip from Venice we had to change trains in Bologna. As we approached our seats we found that two people were occupying the seats we had purchased. Earlier in the week I had learned of a similar incident, and the Americans simply showed their ticket to the people in their seats causing them to move. I had my ticket in hand and held it up to show it to the people in our seats. An Italian gentleman sitting across the table, facing these seats remarked, "Calma, calma." I interpreted this to mean, "Calm down, lady!" in that his tone was one of distain. At that point I was thinking, "This man is not fond of Americans."
The people promptly left us to our seats with out argument. The man across from us turned his attention to his newspaper, and we settled into our seats. About five minutes later the lights and the air conditioning in the train turned off. We hadn't left the platform yet. An announcement informed the passengers that there would be a delay due to mechanical problems. My husband stood up to stretch and I positioned myself to face him by turning and kneeling on the seat. As I moved my feet I accidently nudged the gentleman's leg with my foot. He practically growled at me quite begrudgingly. I apologized profusely in the Italian I know, "Scusi, scusi!" as well as in English, embellishing with hand gestures of humility and regret. He was having none of it. He scowled and rumpled his paper in disgust. Eventually he left and did not return leaving me to think, "I just added evidence to his theory that Americans are crass and oblivious to the existence let alone space occupied by others."
In a later conversation Steve suggested many Italians in high tourist traffic areas might suffer from "tourist fatigue." Rather than progress through the continuum, they my simply remain aware of the others due to constant contact, but resist moving toward understanding because tourists can be such impositions with their "other ways" contrary to "our way." I, on the other hand, am consciously working my way through the intercultural learning continuum with the goal of achieving selective adaptation. I am here to transform aspects of my lifestyle. I made sure I was understanding and patient with the people in our seats. My tone was conciliatory. My apology was sincere. I worked in my heart to understand and accept the gentleman's begrudging attitude. Distancing myself I think the incident helped my see situations at home in the US from a local level where individuals complain, "What are they doing here if they don't know the language?" or expressions of annoyance when visitors from our sister city in Japan behave in ways that demonstrate a lack of awareness of American protocol. Some people seem to prefer to stay stuck and hold on to their reasons to growl.
